What have I learned since 2021?…

1. If your S/O isn’t wanting to talk/connect/spend time with you over time then It needs to be talked about. It’s so important to meet on the same page and work through things together, good or bad. If you don’t wanna be with that person, it’s time to speak up so you both can figure it out. Otherwise, you end up destroying someone emotionally. It happened to me.
2. For the love of God, do not trust a still married man, who claims they are going to get a divorce, talk you into overstepping your own boundaries. People will tell you exactly what you want to hear.
3. Do not trust someone so easily or think you “know” someone just because you knew them a long time ago.
4. When people show you who they are believe them!!!!!!!!
5. Expectations will break your own heart. Over and over and over.
6. Rely on God and hold onto faith.
7. Take time to get to know someone before you give your all to them because you need to see If this person will still be around or make space for you in their life or not.
8. No matter what you try to do/say/think and even If you love this person with your entire existence and heart… it will not matter If they do not feel the same and love you back.
9. Never love someone so much that you end up disrespecting yourself, esp not again and again.
10. Don’t say It won’t happen to you.
11. Don’t judge people’s choices when you don’t see the choices they had.
12. People can change on you instantly and walk away like your life together didn’t happen.
13. Work on yourself and your traumas so that you don’t end up destroying your relationships.
14. That life can really, really, really, really suck.
15. That life gets better, eventually.
16. Some people are impossible to have decent conversations with because they constantly criticize and blame someone else to avoid accountability.
17. There are still good, honest men out there. Even If they come into your life differently than you would ever imagine.

So, the time I posted was 2020.

It’s been almost 4 years …

2021 I became an ex-wife even though that is not what I wanted for our family.

2022 I trusted someone else to start a new life with, became pregnant with twins, lived in his wife’s house for part of 2022, only for him to change his mind, say I’m not his problem, and then I ended up homeless and scrambling by myself with all 5 of my kids, including newborn twins.

I gave birth alone for the first time. So much has impacted me since 2021, so many tears cried.

My church friends in Alabama said they would help me so in November of 2022, with the help of church people in Florida and Alabama, I moved back to the same town in Alabama my ex and I had lived when Katie was little. A lot of memories here.

For the first time in my life I have my own place. My OWN. I lost most of my belongings, things that I can never get back that were from my childhood, and things that my ex and I had bought over our almost 18 years together. Those were left behind because there was not enough room and I was out of time to leave. It still makes me sick… the rest of my stuff was left behind in Florida because again, there wasn’t enough room and a lot of it was ruined.

My life has felt like the Twilight Zone but I’m stronger than ever.

Leaning on God and relying on faith has brought every blessing I have into my life and I’m forever grateful.